"Midas Mulligan?"

"Who's asking?"

"Someone who knows what it's like to work for himself, and not to let others feed off the profit of his energy."

It's an odd quote to come across at a time like this.  I think about my position here, and what possibilities lie in front of me.  I find myself constantly telling people that I have the answers to their problems, but refusing service because of money.  I want to get paid.  I'm in debt, not a lot of debt, but debt none the less.  I don't want money for any charitable reason, or any reason that has any sort of good will towards men.  Trust me, I am a good person, and I will do good things.  That isn't why I want money.  I want money for dumb, vain reasons ...

I want money because I like expensive things.  I like soft clothes.  I want everything to be flashy.  I want a big gold chain just to have it.  I want a shiny yellow convertible with a black canvas top, just so I can blast black & yellow and have everyone hate me ... just because I have some matching sneakers and a watch.  I don't need money to do good things for the world.  I do that anyway.  I want money just so I can play, and I deserve to play.

I want money because my skills are worth it.  I can quantify all those skills.  I demand X dollars.  I can tell you when you will recoup your investment.  I am usually pessimistic.  I never fail, unless I know that I'm going to fail beforehand.

I just picked up a personal training gig.  My cost is a little less than $300 for 18 sessions.  That's really cheap.  He's a friend, and I feel bad taking money from a friend anyway.  Honestly though?  You can spend $300 on an outfit that makes you feel better.  You can also spend $300 on a bit of my time, and make all your outfits look better.  How's that sound?

I know that this gig will bring me more.

I know this sounds like a cop out, but I'm glad I didn't get the supervisor job at Whole Foods.  I would have had to take a pay cut from my 55 hour weeks.  I can cut a day off, have less stress, open my schedule up, and still make more money.  Is there a larger future for me?  Actually, there still is, and perhaps a better one.

They told me they want to talk to me about accomplishing the things that I spoke about, and I know what my answer will be ... Let me know when you're willing to pay for that job, and I'll do it.

I can quantify my skills in other ways.  How much is your rent?  What is your total output?  Where are your bottlenecks?  I will identify them.  I will show you how much they are costing you, and I will tell you how to fix them.  I will let you know when you will recoup your investment.

What is your problem?  I will fix it.  Just give me a little time.

I can't wait until they post the job again.  I can't wait for the next interview.

You guys are offering me crumbs, and telling me that I'm lucky to have it.  That's not how this works.  You're lucky to have me.  You need me more than I need you.  No one else can offer as much, and if you can prove me wrong, well, I'll gladly join the team.